Relationship Coaching FAQ

Coaching can be thought of as a combination of learning and action. A coach helps you to learn what you need to know and to take specific actions that achieve your goals. Because of this, there is no need to spend years of trial and error attempting to learn the correct approach. Relationship coaches have skills related to making and keeping relationships (in addition to general life coaching skills). With severely damaged relationships, the window of opportunity for action is very limited. There is less room for making mistakes and less time to take corrective action.

I can call you on any phone number or you can use Skype.  If you use Skype and have a web camera, you can have a face to face session.  Whatever option you choose, there are no additional charges.

The emphasis of counseling is the restoration of an individual to his or her highest level of previous functioning. To restore a person to this level, the goals of counseling relate to overcoming problems which have caused the person to fall below the previous level of functioning. Thus, if a person has developed an anxiety disorder, the goal is to remove the disorder. Once this is done, the counseling is essentially finished unless other problems are identified. While this approach is essential for those with serious problems, it does very little to help a person to go beyond their previous level of functioning. Counseling tends also to be insurance company driven. Insurance companies reimburse based on the medical model and will not pay a therapist to do anything other than to treat a problem.

A counselor or therapist is an expert on psychological functioning and restoring mental health. The goal is to restore mental health.

Coaches, on the other hand, are experts at helping people to reach a higher level of success. That could be in any field, such as sports, business, or relationships. The coach provides expertise, structure, and tools, that allow you to explore your possibilities and create exactly what you want to have. Even people with natural talent improve their performance with coaching.

The people that hire coaches are from all walks of life. My clients are diverse and include realtors, actors, lawyers, housewives, therapists, kindergarten teachers, and many others, as well as the spouses, girlfriends, and boyfriends of such people. What they have in common, though is a desire to excel--to live their life to its fullest potential. There is generally a realization that life is short and that their current abilities and circumstances are somehow keeping them stuck. They believe they are capable of learning and applying new skills.

Many husbands and wives are reluctant to work together at first. This is normal and expected. Their reasons typically are related to their fears that things will become worse rather than better. Once their fears are relieved, their motivation to work together increases. If a relationship was improving (due to your work), but your husband or wife was still not motivated, it is very likely that your spouse is in the relationship for reasons other than your relationship (money, green card, needs someone to be a servant, etc.). In such a case, this would be revealed, giving you the information you need for making good choices for your life.

Not enough research has been done to accurately assess this question. Probably multiple factors account for this such as an increasing dissatisfaction with life, mistrust and disappointment with the current mental healthcare system, an increasing number of coaches, increased promotion of coaching, and word of mouth referrals from people who have been in coaching. Also, because we are becoming an increasingly mobile society, coaching is becoming an increasingly appealing option to traditional therapies which require you to go to an office. In addition, a coaching in a different time zone can better accommodate early morning or late evening hours.

The goals for coaching are determined by you, but the coach will provide tools and support to help you to do this. You do not need to already have goals or skills in goal setting. We will begin by doing a broad assessment of your level of satisfaction with different aspects of your current or most recent relationship. Prior to your coaching session, you will receive a relationship chart. Filling out the chart will help us to find out the areas of strength that you already have and potential areas to focus on. Like everything else in coaching, it is a step-by-step process that is designed to help you experience success.

Coaching is done by telephone or video conferencing. We do not charge extra for video conferencing, though you must have the necessary equipment for such contact. Another benefit of our service is that the coach initiates the call. That way, there are no long distance charges to pay. The coach calls at your scheduled appointment time. There are no waiting rooms or receptionists to deal with. There are several advantages to this type of meeting including greater scheduling flexibility (you or the coach can be anywhere where there is a phone), increased privacy (only you and your coach will know), increased comfort (sometimes it is easier to not be sitting directly in front of the person who is asking you the questions). E-mail does not allow the kind of personal in-the-moment interaction that is needed for effective coaching. E-mail is used, however, to update each other with information, simple questions, and administrative tasks.

Although coaching involves the combination of action and learning, it is not a classroom or lecture environment. You will be the one to decide what, where, and when you will take action. You never need to take a step before you are ready and can decide not to take a step at all if that suits you. Your coach will help you to make plans and wants to hear about your progress, but will in no way grade you or judge you. The coaching relationship is entirely for your benefit. You can progress as quickly or slowly as you like. Your coach will just help you to make sure that the steps you are taking are truly leading toward a more fulfilling life.

You may contact me by voicemail or e-mail You can rest assured that wherever I am I will receive your message and will be able to respond quickly, depending on the urgency of your message.

The base cost is $95.00, USA currency, per 30 minute session. 30, 45, and 60 minute sessions are available. There is a 5% discount for 45 minute sessions, and a 10% discount for 60 minute sessions. There is also a consultation session for first time clients. If you continue with coaching after your consultation, the cost for the consultation will be deducted from your coaching.

Sessions are paid for through Paypal.com. Their site is very secure and they also do currency conversions, if you are not paying with US dollars. When you use Paypal, none of your account information is passed along to me, only the amount paid and your name.