About Coach Jack	e-mail

Books by Dr. Ito

Win-Win Solutions: What to Do When He Won't Change

FREE Communication E-book

Relationship coaching can help you talk to your partner, and find a solution to problems, so you can become closer

Relationship coaching is one of several things that you can do to really make a difference in your relationship.

People with Minor Relationship Relationship Problems are::
- Talking regularly with their partner about how they want their relationship to be,
- Reading self-help books to continue to grow personally and become a better partner,
- Getting away to a marriage/couple's retreat once a year to have a good time and to "freshen" their relationship, and
- Getting a few sessions of help from a relationship coach if they are having a particularly hard time getting past a certain issue, or just working together.
What they are not doing is letting little problems become big ones, because that could really start their relationship in a bad direction.
Resources

People with Moderate Relationship Problems are:

Talking to their partners about how problems they have noticed are getting in the way of their emotional connection
Learning how to deal with the issues by searching out specific self-help books
Talking to others they trust,
Getting professional help if the relationship has been getting worse for three months or more.
Making a plan with their partner, even if it is a simple one, to move the relationship forward, and
Making an effort to focus on their love for each other, and their commitment to be a good partner.

What they are not doing is becoming more critical and withdrawing, which would only make their relationship worse.
Resources

People with Severe Relationship Problems Are:
- Recognizing their need for help, that what they are doing really is not helping their relationship to get better,
- Working in couple's counseling or couple's coaching with their partner to get their relationship back on track,
- Working in individual counseling or individual coaching if their partners are not yet ready or refuse to work on the relationship, and
- Setting boundaries and being assertive for the sake of their relationship.
What they are not doing is waiting until their partner is ready to end the relationship, because at that time it will be much harder to save the relationship.
Marriage/couples retreats are also not recommended for people with severe problems as their is a larger risk of further damaging the relationship than helping it.
Resources

People Who Have Already Been Rejected by Their Partners Are:

Either letting their partners go or
Getting professional help immediately to re-connect with their partners and create a better relationship with them.

They are not becoming needy and desperate, because that is unattractive and would only push their partner further away.
Resources

There is every reason for hope and a positive outlook when you do the things that really matter.

Could you use help with any of these important relationship saving steps?:

Recognizing which of your responses to your partner are not helpful.
Knowing where to start to make changes.
Being assertive without being needy or controlling.
Building respect so that your partner will want to cooperate and communicate.
Structuring your communication so that it is positive and productive.
Working together with your partner instead of being on opposite sides..

Doing is the Key to Improving Your Relationship

No matter your situation, there are some very important things that you can do to improve your relationship. Some you can do on your own, and some you may need help with. My job is helping people with the really tough stuff that threatens their relationships. Most of the people I work with are doubtful that their relationship will last 6 more months. If this is your situation, I will tell you what I tell them, "there is always something that we can do." We can figure out together what that is. You don't have to struggle on your own.

Some Resources for You:

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